Posted in art, dance, favourite things, Music, photos, quiet moments

with veins of gold

Kintsugi

Translation from Spanish*:

“The Kintsugi is a Japanese technique for repair of broken porcelain and ceramics by which cracks are highlighted with a lacquer containing gold dust.

When something has been damaged – and therefore already have a story – it becomes even more beautiful and unique.”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Some dreams are so precious, so inextricably woven into the fibre of our being. For me, that was, and always has been to dance, to be “a dancer.” When I was 13, I had to abandon my dream against my will. The class for the second year of Tap 5 (Al Gilbert Technique) was on Saturday. Game over .

Perhaps some backstory would be helpful.

My parents were members of a church, a church that, at the time, was listed in Walter Martin’s book, “The Kingdom of the Cults.” Without going into a lot of detail, one of the very rigidly regulated doctrines had to do with what were acceptable Sabbath activities. (We kept all of the Holy Days described in the Old Testament — and no, we didn’t actually perform animal sacrifices as was rumoured.) To have taken the class was “unthinkable.” Dance class, worldly pursuits, personal pleasure, were not on the list. And for reasons unknown to me, no attempt was made to find another school that offered the second year of Tap 5 on a different day. I don’t know why, and I’ve never ventured to ask.

Like a priceless, fragile vase that’s been broken, I’ve carried the pieces of my dream with me, safely sheltered in my heart. Barely whispering of it, protecting myself, spoken words painful. I’ve continued to dance, mainly in solitude. Music, paintings, sculpture, images of dance are like food to me.

It has seemed so impossible that I would ever have the opportunity, the years speeding past, the future spreading out blankly before me, that I didn’t even dare to include it on my list of “Six Impossible Things.” I could see no way to reach it at this point in my life.

Then last night, I had my first flamenco class. When I entered the room, music was playing, Laura, our instructor, was leading some stretching exercises. I changed my shoes, joined in with the group, and was warmly welcomed. As the evening progressed, it was like the broken pieces of my dream had been gathered, mended with gold, and given back to me. The thirty-something lost years falling away, and in their place a profound sense of connection, a feeling of home, of being exactly where I needed to be at that moment.

All I could think was, “Thank you, Papa.” I am once again humbled by His grace.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven . . . a time to mourn and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4)

This is a time to dance.

. . . . . . .

*Translation via Google Translate.

13 thoughts on “with veins of gold

  1. That is a wonderful story with so many layers, the gold to fill in the spaces time and life made to show its value, and the way things like dreams or other things seem so separated by time that the gap is too great…..and then something happens..time folds so past and present touch and the dream is still there like home. I love this story.

    Like

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