an echoing question
something’s hiding near
my heart. From the tower, I
call out, “Friend or Foe?”
“Friend or Foe?” I’ve allowed that question to continue echoing — for nearly five months. I’ve been biding my time, seeing if this thing, this intruder that suddenly appeared, would show itself to be a hormonally-related cyst, harmless, and simply go away. However, it’s probably foolish to leave the question echoing for much longer, remaining unanswered. I need to seek out some help and align myself with someone who’s able to guide me in choosing an effective course of action.
This week I began walking along my path of healing. I picked up the phone. Set an appointment. It’s not until near the end of January — Dr. Zoe’s first available opening for a new patient consultation– but I’ve made the first move. I also phoned Central Coast Thermography and was actually able to speak with Gaea Powell. She was extremely helpful, suggesting I do some specific research about lymphatic massage, the possible connection between vitamin D deficiencies and cancer, and read a book entitled, Cancer is Not a Disease, by Andreas Moritz. On Friday, I was able to make an appointment for a preliminary set of thermography scans. Second week of January. At this moment, it seems like forever away.
I’m feeling much better though, more encouraged, more proactive. I have some things to do in the meantime that might make a significant difference. And I’m determined to believe that something wonderful is going to come from this.
Am I still frightened? Yes. Will I have times in the coming months of being fearful, uncertain, wondering if I’m going the right way? Very likely.
I don’t know what is along this road I’m travelling, what I’ll encounter. But when do we ever? What I do know is that I’m not alone. Family, friends, and most of all, I know that my Papa will never leave my side. He’s always there, listening, comforting, ready to lift me up and carry me. I also know that He’ll gently remind me when I forget that, as I walk along this path of healing, step by step.